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Q: I take satisfaction in filling a number of important roles: husband, father, breadwinner, church leader, youth sports coach, etc. But I often feel like I'm running behind -- and I know my family suffers for it. How can I find a better life balance?

Jim: I think we're all busier than ever before. With work pressures, family responsibilities and all the other things in our lives, the list can be endless.

I'm reminded of a famous quote often attributed to Samuel L. Clemens, better known by his pen name of Mark Twain: "The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and starting on the first one." Now, I don't know if Clemens himself actually said that, but it's a good principle. When things start to get overwhelming, sometimes it helps to just address one thing or person at a time -- starting with those closest to you.

Maybe you need to prioritize your commitments, saying "no" to good things so you can say "yes" to better things -- like making time for dates with your wife or conversations with your children. Perhaps your family needs to turn off all the electronic devices and eat dinner together. Maybe you need to make the first move to mend a broken relationship. You might just need to organize your office or home.

Stress affects everyone and comes in all shapes and sizes. But how we handle it can mean the difference between sinking or swimming. Making even the smallest changes -- taking life one day, even one breath, at a time -- can keep you moving forward.

For more tips to help your family thrive, visit FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Q: When I want to express my love for my husband verbally or in writing, I generally list reasons why he means so much to me: He's a good dad, provides for our family, etc. But he doesn't seem to appreciate those compliments like he used to. What am I missing?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: I think most of us, when we make a list of the reasons why we love our spouse, probably start with "because ..." In other words, I love my wife because she's good to me ... because she's kind ... because she's considerate ... because she's romantic.

Now, there's nothing wrong with those things. But true lasting love goes much deeper than that. Author Gary Thomas notes that it's easy to love someone because they make you feel good about yourself or they do nice things for you. Appreciation comes naturally in those cases.

However, even the best spouse is going to let you down from time to time. All of us tend to be self-absorbed, forgetful or maybe just grouchy. That's true of you and me, and it's true of the people we're married to. But if you can love a spouse who disappoints you, you aren't loving them "because" of anything -- you're loving them anyway.

Will a woman love her husband who doesn't express appreciation for the sacrifices she makes? Who perhaps takes her for granted? Can a man love a wife who isn't as kind to him as he is to her? We all want to be loved anyway, in spite of our own faults. So, shouldn't we treat the person closest to us the way we want to be treated?

One key to a healthy marriage is to reach the point where you and your spouse can say to each other, "I love you because, AND I love you anyway." If you can get that balance right, your marriage has a much better chance of thriving in the long run.

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Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at jimdalyblog.focusonthefamily.com or at Facebook.com/JimDalyFocus.

Copyright 2025 Focus On The Family. (This feature may not by reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without written permission of Focus on the Family.)

COPYRIGHT 2025 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.