A 5.2 earthquake hit right outside San Diego this morning, a group of celebrity women launched into space on Jeff Bezos’ Blue Origin rocket, Katy Perry gave quite the interview after her experience, Bernie Sanders was at Coachella over the weekend where he gave a rousing speech about America, Rory McIlroy won The Masters, the results of Trump’s annual physical exam are in and he “remains in excellent health,” his doctor claims that Trump is 6’3” and 224 lbs, Donald gave his own medical update to reporters on Air Force One where he bragged about how he aced a rudimentary cognitive test, JD Vance dropped the college football trophy while the National Champion Ohio State Buckeyes visited the White House, Trump coldly rejected RFK Jr’s wife Cheryl Hines over the weekend at a UFC fight, Secretary of Education Linda McMahon is making a run at the clown crown by revealing that she has no idea what A.I. is, there was more tariff confusion over the weekend, and with Easter right around the corner The White House is scrambling to lower the price of eggs.