Playing Chicken With My Dinner
"What do you want for dinner?" I asked my husband.
"How about fish?" he replied.
I shook my head. "I had fish for lunch. How about steak?"
"I'm sick of steak," he said. "How about chicken?"
I nodded. "Chicken it is."
My husband went outside to light the grill while I jumped in the car to go get the food. I had planned to run into the supermarket, get the chicken, and then go right back home. But when I got inside, I realized I needed a bunch of other things. Half an hour later, I checked out with all my groceries and went home. ...
Without the chicken.
"Ugh, I never bought the chicken!" I groaned as I finished unpacking the bags. I scanned my receipt. No chicken.
"What are you going to do?" my husband asked.
"Go back and get the chicken."
I got back in the car and returned to the supermarket, purchased the chicken and went home. ...
Without the chicken.
"Oh my god! I did it again," I sighed. "This time I remembered to buy the chicken, but I must have left it in the bag at checkout."
"What are you going to do?" he asked again.
"Go back and pick up my chicken!"
I really couldn't believe I had forgotten the chicken twice. I wasn't usually that forgetful. Yes, I did forget to pick up my luggage at baggage claim once. And I also forgot to pick up my daughter from school once. And I did leave my son at Target that one time. So maybe I was a little forgetful. But based on this track record, I'd probably forget that I was forgetful so I didn't really have to worry that it might be a problem.
Cursing all the way to my car, I went back to the supermarket to get another chicken. I showed them my receipt and explained the situation, and they let me pick another one. Then I threw it in my cart and went home. ...
Without the chicken.
"Where's the chicken?" asked my husband as I walked in the door utterly chicken-less.
I looked down at my empty hands and slapped my forehead.
"I can't even believe it," I replied. "I think I left it in the shopping cart."
"Honey, do you have memory issues?"
"No, but apparently I have poultry issues."
At this point, I wondered if I should change our dinner plan. But I had already bought all the stuff to go with the chicken, and everyone was looking forward to it, so I decided I would give it one more shot. I got in the car one last time and went off, again, to the supermarket. When I got home, I held up a supermarket bag in triumph.
"Did you get the chicken?" my husband asked tentatively when I walked in the door.
"No," I replied. "I decided we should have steak instead."
"Why?"
"They were out of chicken."
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Tracy Beckerman is the author of the Amazon Bestseller, "Barking at the Moon: A Story of Life, Love, and Kibble," available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble online! You can visit her at www.tracybeckerman.com.
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