St. Mom's Wort - Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours.

Empty Nestrogen - Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of...Read More

David filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station.

After he had paid and driven away, he realized that he had left the gas cap on top of his car. He stopped and looked and, sure enough, it was lost.

Well, he ...Read More

A pirate walks into a bar with a mangy, infected parrot on his shoulder.

The bartender says, "You shouldn't be that close to something so disgusting, such a low-life animal."

The pirate says, "Arr, it's ok, he's had his ...Read More

A pirate walks into a bar wearing a paper towel on his head. He sits down at the bar and orders some dirty rum.

The bartender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?"

"Arrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me...Read More

Jimmy Piersall, on how to diaper a baby:

"Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond, with you at bat.

Then, fold second-base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.

Put first-base and third together...Read More

From Wikipedia: "Ayds (pronounced as "aids") Reducing Plan Candy was an appetite-suppressant candy which enjoyed strong sales in the 1970s and early 1980s and was originally manufactured by The Campana Company. It was ...Read More